The mysterious box by lucy randle

Suddenly, one day there was a mysterious box by the front door.  Then later that day the black box had been causing a lot of trouble like: making me go somewhere I didn’t want to go, making things come out of the cupboard and moving around.  As the day progressed more and more strange things kept happening, my mom’s car stopped working, my dog turned pink and the house had shrunk. I slowly opened the black box by the pink ribbon that was tied on top. Then there was a flash! And a bang! Then a small person appeared…  

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One Response
  1. Govind says:

    Well done Lucy, here are your two stars and wish:
    *you used L5 punctuation such as … :
    *You used a variety of different openers such as suddenly.
    Wish: Next time, try and use a ;
    Well done, overall this piece of writing was very good. 😀

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